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I got your Space Force for you right here

Published Tuesday, July 03, 2018 @ 2:26 PM EDT
Jul 03 2018

So the Cheeto in Chief wants himself a Space Force! I say give it to him, mainly because one already kinda exists.

The purpose of such an entity, one assumes, would be to defend the good ol' US of A, which is conveniently situated on the planet Earth. And wouldn't you know it, the aforementioned USA already has something called the Planetary Defense Coordination Office (PDCO), which is nowhere near as cool as Space Force!, but I'm sure changing the name wouldn't be a big deal.

Located within NASA’s Planetary Science Division, the purpose of PDCO Space Force! is to lead the coordination of interagency and intergovernmental efforts to plan responses to potential impact threats. Throw a little more money their way, though, and point them toward the defense industry folk at the Pentagon, and I'm certain they'll develop phasers and photon torpedos and deflectors and tractor beams and whatnot to handily dispose of any incoming meteors or comets or- nudge, nudge, wink, wink, say no more- ballistic missiles.


The Fermi paradox, or Fermi's paradox, named after physicist Enrico Fermi, is the apparent contradiction between the lack of evidence and high probability estimates for the existence of extraterrestrial civilizations.

Where are the Vulcans and the other friendly beings of the would-be United Federation of Planets? A scout expedition performed a thorough survey of the Terran system recently, including its culture and politics, and came to several reasoned observations:

Terran civilization still hasn't mastered solar power, nuclear fusion, or faster-than-light travel. And it probably never will, because:

Terran civilization has the ability to develop technology to prevent the destruction of its atmosphere by a runaway greenhouse effect they themselves caused.

Terran civilization has the ability to develop technology to detect, prevent, or mitigate collisions with asteroids, meteors, comets and other celestrial objects capable of producing extinction-level events.


Terran civilization refuses to dedicate the resources- or as the natives say, "spend the bucks"- to accomplish these tasks, even though they are essential for the ongoing survival of not only their species, but potentially all multi-cellular animal life on the planet.

Do we really want to associate ourselves with a race as self-absorbed as the Catullans and as ethically challenged as the Iotians? Screw 'em, we say. We hear the Alpha Centauri system has three stars, a bunch of life-supporting planets, and is just 7.34 Terran Solar Days away at warp six.

Categories: Alpha Centauri, Fermi paradox, NASA, Planetary Defense Coordination Office, Space Force, Star Trek, The Daily KGB Report


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