KGB Report

Mormons believe Joseph Smith received golden plates from an angel on a hill, when everybody knows Moses got stone tablets from a burning bush on a mountain.

(Video: "Yaweh or No Way" - The Colbert Report)

"Only 71% approve of God's handling of creating the universe. That means for 29%, the infinite and unknowable everything isn't cutting' it." Which lends further credence to The KGB Batsh*t Constant.

Categories: Colbert Report, KGB, Stephen Colbert

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Recently enshrined in The KGB Quotations Database:

I'm not afraid of dying. I'm prepared for death because I don't believe in it. I think it's just getting out of one car and getting into another.
-John Lennon

Ah, the gap between expectation and achievement is filled with the screams of good men, still falling.
-Reginald Hill

I may be just an empty flesh terminal relying on technology for all my ideas, memories and relationships, but I am confident that all of that, everything that makes me a unique human being, is still out there, somewhere, safe in the theoretical storage space owned by giant multi-national corporations.
-Stephen Colbert

Even a fool could see that one didn't need a war, nuclear or otherwise, to destroy oneself; the rising cost of weaponry could do that quite nicely.
-Stanislaw Lem

If man had more of a sense of humor, things might have turned out differently.
-Stanislaw Lem

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