A critic is a gong at a railroad crossing, clanging loudly and vainly as the train goes by.
--Christopher Morley
A human being is an ingenious assembly of portable plumbing.
--Christopher Morley
A man who has never made a woman angry is a failure in life.
--Christopher Morley
All cities are mad: but the madness is gallant. All cities are beautiful, but the beauty is grim.
--Christopher Morley
America is still a government of the naive, for the naive, and by the naive. He who does not know this, nor relish it, has no inkling of the nature of his country.
--Christopher Morley
Any man worth his salt has by the time he is forty-five accumulated a crown of thorns, and the problem is to learn to wear it over one ear.
--Christopher Morley
Big shots are only little shots who keep shooting.
--Christopher Morley
Cherish all your happy moments: they make a fine cushion for old age.
--Christopher Morley
High heels were invented by a woman who had been kissed on the forehead.
--Christopher Morley
Humor is perhaps a sense of intellectual perspective: an awareness that some things are really important, others not; and that the two kinds are most oddly jumbled in everyday affairs.
--Christopher Morley
If people realized that almost everything conceivably sayable has been said by Montaigne, why should they ever buy another book?
--Christopher Morley
It's a good thing to turn your mind upside down now and then, like an hour-glass, to let the particles run the other way.
--Christopher Morley
Life is a foreign language: all men mispronounce it.
--Christopher Morley
Lots of times you have to pretend to join a parade in which you're not really interested in order to get where you're going.
--Christopher Morley
Man is unconquerable because he can make even his helplessness so entertaining. His motto seems to be 'Even though He slay me, yet will I make fun of Him!'.
--Christopher Morley
Men talk of 'finding God,' but no wonder it is difficult; He is hidden in that darkest of hiding places, your own heart.
--Christopher Morley
My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated, but not signed.
(attributed).
--Christopher Morley
No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does.
--Christopher Morley
Philadelphia was the first city to foresee the advantages of a Federal constitution and oatmeal as a breakfast food.
--Christopher Morley
Printer's ink has been running a race against gunpowder these many, many years. Ink is handicapped, in a way, because you can blow up a man with gunpowder in half a second, while it may take twenty years to blow him up with a book. But the gunpowder destroys itself along with its victim, while a book can keep on exploding for centuries.
--Christopher Morley
Read, every day, something no one else is reading. Think, every day, something no one else is thinking. Do, every day, something no one else would be silly enough to do. It is bad for the mind to be always part of a unanimity.
--Christopher Morley
The courage of the poet is to keep ajar the door that leads into madness.
--Christopher Morley
The enemies of the Future are always the very nicest people.
--Christopher Morley
The misfortunes hardest to bear are these which never came.
--Christopher Morley
The trouble with wedlock is there's not enough wed and too much lock.
--Christopher Morley
There is only one success: to be able to spend your life in your own way.
--Christopher Morley
We've had bad luck with our kids- they've all grown up.
--Christopher Morley
Why do they put the Gideon Bibles only in the bedrooms, where it's usually too late, and not in the barroom downstairs?
--Christopher Morley
Found 28 occurence(s) in 52,543 quotation(s).