A golf course outside a big town serves an excellent purpose in that it
segregates, as though a concentration camp, all the idle and idiot
well-to-do.
-Osbert Sitwell
Accepting your limitations makes you humble. The limitations themselves
make you an idiot.
-Dan Goodman
All ideologies are idiotic, whether religious or political, for it is
conceptual thinking, the conceptual word, which has so unfortunately
divided man.
-Jiddu Krishnamurti
Almost everybody is born a genius and buried an idiot.
-Charles
Bukowski
An idiot with a computer is a faster, better idiot.
-Rich Julius
Any idiot can face a crisis. It's this day-to-day living that wears you
out.
-Anton Chekhov
Any idiot can get laid when they're famous. That's easy. It's getting
laid when you're not famous that takes some talent.
-Kevin Bacon
Any idiot can use a computer. Many do.
-Variously attributed
Applications programming is a race between software engineers, who
strive to produce idiot-proof programs, and the universe which strives
to produce bigger idiots. So far the Universe is winning.
-Rich
Cook
As usual, there is a great woman behind every idiot.
-John Lennon
Because people have no thoughts to deal in, they deal cards, and try and
win one another's money. Idiots!
-Arthur Schopenhauer
By any precise definition, Washington is a city of advanced depravity.
There one meets and dines with the truly great killers of the age, but
only the quirkily fastidious are offended, for the killers are urbane
and learned gentlemen who discuss their work with wit and charm and know
which tool to use on the escargots.
-Russell Baker
Demagogue: One who preaches doctrines he knows to be untrue to men he
knows to be idiots.
-H.L. Mencken
Dictatorships foster oppression, dictatorships foster servitude,
dictatorships foster cruelty; more abominable is the fact that they
foster idiocy.
-Jorge Luis Borges
Doctors always think anybody doing something they aren't is a quack;
also they think all patients are idiots.
-Flannery O'Connor
Dreams are like rainbows. Only idiots chase them.
-Larry Kersten,
PhD
Four out of five people think the fifth one is an idiot.
-Variously
attributed
Half the world is composed of idiots, the other half of people clever
enough to take indecent advantage of them.
-Walter Kerr
He may look like an idiot, and he may talk like an idiot, but don't let
him fool you. He really is an idiot.
-Groucho Marx
He was a dreamer, a thinker, a speculative philosopher... or, as his
wife would have it, an idiot.
-Douglas Adams
I am beginning to suspect all elaborate and special systems of
education. They seem to me to be built up on the supposition that every
child is a kind of idiot who must be taught to think.
-Anne
Sullivan
I believe entertainment can aspire to be art, and can become art, but if
you set out to make art you're an idiot.
-Steve Martin
I don't believe in conclusions. I think that human idiocy perpetuates
itself.
-Joseph L. Mankiewicz
I hadn't known there were so many idiots in the world until I started
using the Internet.
-Stanislaw Lem
I have yet to hear anyone say something that seemed likely to mitigate
the idiocy of this age.
-John Perry Barlow
I know that children love Elmo. But children are idiots.
-Joel
Stein
I try to buy stock in businesses that are so wonderful that an idiot can
run them. Because sooner or later, one will.
-Warren Buffett
I'd like to know why well-educated idiots keep apologizing for lazy and
complaining people who think the world owes them a living.
-John
Wayne
Idiot, n. A member of a large and powerful tribe whose influence in
human affairs has always been dominant and controlling. The Idiot's
activity is not confined to any special field of thought or action, but
'pervades and regulates the whole.' He has the last word in everything;
his decision is unappealable. He sets the fashions and opinion of taste,
dictates the limitations of speech and circumscribes conduct with a
deadline.
-Ambrose Bierce
If an idiot were to tell you the same story every day for a year, you
would end by believing it.
-Edmund Burke
If you are rich, you have to be an idiot not to stay rich. And if you
are poor, you have to be really smart to get rich.
-John Green
If you had to stop and think what some idiot might do after seeing the
movie, you'd never do anything.
-Quentin Tarentino
If you think your users are idiots, only idiots will use it.
-Linus
Torvalds
In romance, as in life, you only learn when you're losing. When you're
winning, you just sit there and grin like an idiot.
-Garrison
Keillor
In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made
school boards.
-Mark Twain
It is incredible that only idiots are absolutely sure of salvation. It
is incredible that the more brain you have the less your chance is.
There can be no danger in honest thought, and if the world ever advances
beyond what it is to-day, it must be led by men who express their real
opinions.
-Robert G. Ingersoll
It's good to live on the coast, because that way the idiots are only on
three sides of you.
-Variously attributed
It's hard not to be condescending when you're talking to an idiot.
-Bill
Maher
It's truly a blessing to have total freaking idiots as your enemy.
-Rachel
Maddow
Just because the person who criticizes you is an idiot doesn't make him
wrong.
-Roger Rosenblatt
Mechanical instruments, potentially a vehicle of rational human
purposes, are scarcely a blessing when they enable the gossip of the
village idiot and the deeds of the thug to be broadcast to a million
people each day.
-Lewis Mumford
Millions are to be grabbed out here and your only competition is idiots.
Don't let this get around. (telling Ben Hecht about Hollywood)
-Herman
Mankiewicz
Never argue with idiots. They will bring you down to their level, then
overwhelm you with their experience.
-Dave Johnson
No one ever heard of the truth being enforced by law. Whenever the
secular arm is called in to sustain an idea, whether new or old, it is
always a bad idea, and not infrequently it is downright idiotic.
-H.L.
Mencken
Nothing is more humiliating than to see idiots succeed in enterprises in
which we have failed.
-Gustave Flaubert
Now we live in an amazing, amazing world and it's wasted on the
crappiest generation of spoiled idiots.
-Louis C.K.
Of all the idiots I have met in my life, and the Lord knows that they
have not been few or little, I think that I have been the biggest.
-Isak
Dinesen
One can relish the varied idiocy of human action during a panic to the
full, for, while it is a time of great tragedy, nothing is being lost
but money.
-John Kenneth Galbraith
One Englishman- an idiot, two Englishmen- a sporting event, three
Englishmen- an empire.
-George Santayana
Patriotism is a pernicious, psychopathic form of idiocy.
-George
Bernard Shaw
People are idiots.
-Scott Adams
People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize
how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world. (From the
comic strip Calvin and Hobbes)
-Bill Watterson
People who drive faster than I do are maniacs, and people who drive
slower than me are idiots.
-George Carlin
Politics makes me uptight; I have so little control over it. It's like
forever being in high school with rah-rah idiots in charge.
-Rudy
Rucker
Quitters never win, winners never quit, but those that never win AND
never quit are idiots.
-Larry Kersten, PhD
Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of
Congress. But I repeat myself.
-Mark Twain
Religions vary in their degree of idiocy, but I reject them all. For
most people, religion is nothing more than a substitute for a
malfunctioning brain.
-Gene Roddenberry
Show me a good loser and I'll show you an idiot.
-Leo Durocher
The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented
the other three, he was a genius.
-Sid Caesar
The Hollywood laborers, the carpenters and painters, were always
perfect. Then came the technicians, the electricians and special effects
men. They were marvelous. However, the higher you climbed in the system,
the lower the level of competence, until you reached the head of the
studio, who turned out to be an idiot.
-Garson Kanin
The kind of man who wants the government to adopt and enforce his ideas
is always the kind of man whose ideas are idiotic.
-H.L. Mencken
The main difference between men and women is that men are lunatics and
women are idiots.
-Rebecca West
The New England Journal of Medicine reports that nine out of ten doctors
agree that one out of ten doctors is an idiot.
-Jay Leno
The notion that a radical is one who hates his country is naive and
usually idiotic. He is, more likely, one who likes his country more than
the rest of us, and is thus more disturbed than the rest of us when he
sees it debauched. He is not a bad citizen turning to crime; he is a
good citizen driven to despair.
-H.L. Mencken
The problem is that religion, because it's been sheltered from criticism
in the way that it has been, allows people- perfectly sane, perfectly
intelligent people- to believe en masse what only idiots or lunatics
could believe in isolation.
-Sam Harris
The problem with the global village is all the global village idiots.
-P.
Ginsparg
The trick is not how much pain you can feel but how much joy. Any idiot
can feel pain. Life is full of excuses to feel pain, excuses not to
live, excuses, excuses excuses... The only pain you feel is for all the
useless pain you felt, all the times you didn't do something because of
cowardice or fear, all the times you let bastards and the kibitzers and
the fear shrinkers hold you back. Watch out for the death people, do you
see what I mean? They're the ones to avoid.
-Henry Miller
The word 'idiot' comes from a Greek root meaning private person. Idiocy
is the female defect: intent on their private lives, women follow their
fate through a darkness deep as that cast by malformed cells in the
brain. It is no worse than the male defect, which is lunacy: men are so
obsessed by public affairs that they see the world as by moonlight,
which shows the outlines of every object but not the details indicative
of their nature.
-Rebecca West
The world is a madhouse, so it's only right it's patrolled by armed
idiots.
-Brendan Behan
The world is just filling up with more and more idiots! And the computer
is giving them access to the world! They're spreading their stupidity!
At least they were contained before- now they're on the loose everywhere!
-Harlan
Ellison
There are idiots who will buy anything as long as it costs enough.
-Andy
Rooney
There are no awards in Hollywood for being an idiot.
-Burt Reynolds
There are no stupid questions, but there a lot of inquisitive idiots.
-Larry
Kersten, PhD
There is a Providence that protects idiots, drunkards, children and the
United States of America.
-Otto von Bismarck
There is a standard answer to this old idiocy of
if-you-know-so-much-about-the-art-of-the-film-why-don't-you-make-movies.
You don't have to lay an egg to know if it tastes good.
-Pauline
Kael
There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like
an idiot.
-Steven Wright
To generalize is to be an Idiot. To particularize is the alone
distinction of merit- general knowledges are those knowledges that
idiots possess.
-William Blake
'We hold these Truths to be self-evident...' which is a gracious,
Jeffersonian, way of saying, 'Any idiot ought to be able to understand
this.'
-Bob McEwen
What do you want me to do? I'm surrounded by a bunch of idiots. And
democracy...
-Indira Gandhi
What is grand is necessarily obscure to weak men. That which can be made
explicit to the idiot is not worth my care.
-William Blake
What the fool cannot learn he laughs at, thinking that by his laughter
he shows superiority instead of latent idiocy.
-Marie Corelli
When in doubt, make a fool of yourself. There is a microscopically thin
line between being brilliantly creative and acting like the most
gigantic idiot on earth. So what the hell, leap.
-Cynthia Heimel
You and I don't repeat history; it's the idiots in charge who think they
can do it better this time around.
-William Q. Johnson
You take a normal guy, give him a wife, give them time, and you've got
an idiot!
-Jeff Foxworthy
Your kid may be an honor student, but you're still an idiot. (Bumper
Sticker)
-Variously attributed
Categories: Idiots
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