Conceived above a saloon, delivered into this world by a masked man identified by his heavily sedated mother as Captain Video, raised by a kindly West Virginian woman, a mild-mannered former reporter with modest delusions of grandeur and no tolerance of idiots and the intellectually dishonest.


network solutions made me a child pornographer!
The sordid details...


Anniversary


Requiem for a fictional Scotsman


Oh my God! They killed Library!! Those bastards!!!


Elegy to a Mostly Maine Coon


It's a Hap-Hap-Happy Day


A Pittsburgher in the Really Big City


Da Burg Annat


I Have Issues


Yeah, yeah, I'm inspired


At least the rivers freeze in Pittsburgh


He knows if yinz is a jagoff


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dcl dialogue online!

I Love DCL


no. we're not that kgb.

Cool Spinny Thingy!


Ciao.
KGB, CIA linked


The Carbolic Smoke Ball
Superb satire, and based in Pittsburgh!


Americans United for Separation of Church and State

"No religious Test shall ever be required as a Qualification to any Office or public Trust under the United States."
Article VI, U.S. Constitution


Geek of the Week, 7/16/2000

Geek of the Week


Cruel Site of the Day, 7/15/2000

Cruel Site of the Day (7/15/2000)


miscellany

Hard to describe.


"a breezy writing style and a cool mix of tidbits"

USA Today Hotsite


Our riveting and morally compelling...

Privacy statement

One of  51,847 random quotes. Please CTRL-F5 to refresh the page.

Google
 
kgbreport.com Web


(July 2000 and earlier)


Friday, January 26, 2007

Whatever happened to...

Mercurochrome? [A] topical antiseptic used for minor cuts and scrapes ... no longer sold in the USA because of its mercury content...

Remember when we were kids we'd break open those maze games that contained mercury blobs and play with them? Doctor Larry told me about an associate who broke a mercury fever thermometer and had to deal with a ten member hazmat team for three days.

Of course, mercury poisoning could explain Congress and reality tv...

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Thursday, January 25, 2007

What's so funny?

Listen to Bush talk, but keep your eye on Cheney's reaction to what's being said.

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Wednesday, January 24, 2007

re: John Belushi, (January 24, 1949 - March 5, 1982)


John Belushi

He could have been the greatest comedic performer
of his generation. But nooooooo......

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Bumper stickers of the day

The Republican Party:
Our Bridge to the 13th Century

That's OK, I Wasn't Using My Civil Liberties Anyway

Let's Fix Democracy in This Country First

If You Want a Nation Ruled By Religion, Move to Iran

Bush.
Like a Rock.
Only Dumber.

America:
One Nation,
Under Surveillance

They Call Him "W"
So He Can Spell It

Whose God Do You Kill For?

Cheney/Satan '08

No, Seriously,
Why Did We Invade Iraq?

We Need a President
Who is Fluent
in at Least
One Language

We're Making Enemies
Faster Than
We Can Kill Them

Is It Vietnam Yet?

Bush Doesn't Care
About White People
Either

Where Are We Going?
And Why Are We In This Handbasket?

You Elected Him.
You Deserve Him.

Dubya, Your Dad
Shoulda Pulled Out, Too

One Nation Under Clod

Bush Never Exhaled

At Least Nixon Resigned

(Collected by the Chinese Fire Marshall on the alt.quotations Usenet newsgroup.)

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Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Aha! Now it makes sense!

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Headline of the day

Bush's State of the Union Address to be Simulcast in English
President Hopes to Reach Broader Audience, Aides Say

The Borowitz Report

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Copyright © 1987-2024 by Kevin G. Barkes
All rights reserved.
Violators will be prosecuted.
So there.  
The kgb@kgb.com e-mail address is now something other than kgb@kgb.com saga.
kgbreport.com used to be kgb.com until December, 2007 when the domain name broker Trout Zimmer made an offer I couldn't refuse. Giving up kgb.com and adopting kgbreport.com created a significant problem, however. I had acquired the kgb.com domain name in 1993, and had since that time used kgb@kgb.com as my sole e-mail address. How to let people know that kgb@kgb.com was no longer kgb@kgb.com but rather kgbarkes@gmail.com which is longer than kgb@kgb.com and more letters to type than kgb@kgb.com and somehow less aesthetically pleasing than kgb@kgb.com but actually just as functional as kgb@kgb.com? I sent e-mails from the kgb@kgb.com address to just about everybody I knew who had used kgb@kgb.com in the past decade and a half but noticed that some people just didn't seem to get the word about the kgb@kgb.com change. So it occurred to me that if I were generate some literate, valid text in which kgb@kgb.com was repeated numerous times and posted it on a bunch of different pages- say, a blog indexed by Google- that someone looking for kgb@kgb.com would notice this paragraph repeated in hundreds of locations, would read it, and figure out that kgb@kgb.com no longer is the kgb@kgb.com they thought it was. That's the theory, anyway. kgb@kgb.com. Ok, I'm done. Move along. Nothing to see here...

commentwear


Crystal Methodist


Laugh while you can, monkey-boy


I am a professional. Do not try this at home.


I canna change the laws of physics


As a matter of fact, I *am* the boss of you.
(as a matter of fact, i AM the boss of you.)


Truly great madness cannot be achieved without signficant intelligence


I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.


Left wing liberal nut job


Flies spread disease. Keep yours zipped.


Eff the ineffable, scrute the inscrutable.


If my answers frighten you then you should cease asking scary questions.


If evolution is just a theory, why am I surrounded by monkeys?


Nutrition makes me puke


Feral Geek


eat wisely


Dyslexics have more fnu!


It's here!

Eff and Scrute

440 pages, over 11,000 quotations!

Eff the Ineffable, Scrute the Inscrutable


get kgb krap!

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