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Political jokes of the week
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Published Friday, February 24, 2012 @ 10:30 AM EST
Feb 24 2012

Rick Santorum said today that during his 16 years in Congress, he was an outsider the whole time. You know what? After 16 years, you're not an outsider. You're just unpopular.
–Jay Leno

Santorum says that Satan has his sights set on the United States of America. And today Satan said he tries to avoid politics because it makes him feel dirty.
-Jay Leno

This guy Santorum is very conservative. Rick Santorum is so conservative he won't watch a baseball game because there's a pitcher and a catcher.
–Jay Leno

Analysts say a key voting bloc this election year will be women called "Birth Control Moms." They’re moms who use birth control, but apparently not correctly.
–Conan O'Brien

During a concert at the White House yesterday, President Obama got on stage and performed with Mick Jagger. Apparently, Obama wanted to prove to Republicans that he could work with a rich old white guy.
–Conan O'Brien

Today Newt Gingrich said we should use covert operations to assassinate Iran's nuclear scientists. Gingrich also said the key to covert operations is announcing them on the campaign trail.
–Conan O'Brien


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