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Quotes of the day

Published Saturday, July 07, 2012 @ 5:34 AM EDT
Jul 07 2012

Quotes of the day- Robert A. Heinlein
Robert Anson Heinlein (July 7, 1907 - May 8, 1988) was an American science fiction writer. Often called the "dean of science fiction writers," he was one of the most influential and controversial authors of the genre in his time. He set a standard for scientific and engineering plausibility, and helped to raise the genre's standards of literary quality. (Click for full article.)

A competent and self-confident person is incapable of jealousy in anything. Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity.

A government-supported artist is an incompetent whore!

A long and wicked life followed by five minutes of perfect grace gets you into Heaven. An equally long life of decent living and good works followed by one outburst of taking the name of the Lord in vain, then have a heart attack at that moment and be damned for eternity. Is that the system?

A poet who reads his verse in public may have other nasty habits.

A reverence for life does not require one to respect nature's obvious mistakes.

A zygote is a gamete's way of producing more gametes. This may be the purpose of the universe.

Age does not bring wisdom. Often it merely changes simple stupidity into arrogant conceit.

Age is not an accomplishment, and youth is not a sin.

All societies are based on rules to protect pregnant women and young children.

Always listen to the experts. They'll tell you what can't be done and why. Then do it.

Always tell her she's beautiful, especially if she isn't.

An armed society is a polite society.

Anyone who considers protocol unimportant has never dealt with a cat.

Aside from a cold appreciation of my own genius I felt that I was a modest man.

Being a mother is an attitude, not a biological relation.

Being intelligent is not a felony. But most societies evaluate it as at least a misdemeanor.

Being right too soon is socially unacceptable.

Belief gets in the way of learning.

Beware of altruism. It is based on self-deception, the root of all evil.

Climate is what you expect. Weather is what you get.

Delusions are often functional. A mother's opinions about her children's beauty, intelligence, goodness, et cetera ad nauseam, keep her from drowning them at birth.

Do not handicap your children by making their lives easy.

Don't explain computers to laymen. Simpler to explain sex to virgins.

Early rising may not be a vice... but it is certainly no virtue. The old saw about the early bird just goes to show that the worm should have stayed in bed.

Every law that was ever written opened up a new way to graft.

Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks.

Everything is theoretically impossible, until it's done. One could write a history of science in reverse by assembling the solemn pronouncements of highest authority about what could not be done and could never happen.

Evolution is a process that never stops. Baboons who fail to exhibit moral behavior do not survive; they wind up as meat for leopards.

Fulfillment in life is loving a good woman and killing a bad man.

Getting up early does not get more work done... any more than you can make a piece of string longer by cutting off one end and tying it onto the other.

Government is an inescapable disease of human beings.

History has the relation to truth that theology has to religion- i.e., none to speak of.

How you behave toward cats here below determines your status in Heaven.

I believe in the honest craft of workmen. Take a look around you. There never were enough bosses to check up on all that work. From Independence Hall to the Grand Coulee Dam, these things were built level and square by craftsmen who were honest in their bones.

I don't trust a man who talks about ethics when he is picking my pocket.

I usually read the obituaries first as there is always the happy chance that one of them will make my day.

If you don't like yourself, you can't like other people.

In a society in which it is a moral offense to be different from your neighbor your only escape is to never let them find out.

In all matters of government the correct answer is usually: Do nothing.

In the absence of clearly-defined goals, we become strangely loyal to performing daily trivia until ultimately we become enslaved by it.

Intangibles are the most honest merchandise anyone can sell. They are always worth whatever you are willing to pay for them and they never wear out.

It is better to copulate than never.

It never does any good to warn a man about his wife.

It's amazing how much mature wisdom resembles being too tired.

Little girls, like butterflies, need no excuse.

Logic is a way of saying that anything that didn't happen yesterday won't happen tomorrow.

Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.

Love your country, but never trust its government.

Man can be chained but he cannot be domesticated, and eventually he always breaks his chains.

Man is not a rational animal, he is a rationalizing animal.

Men rarely (if ever) manage to dream up a god superior to themselves. Most gods have the manners and morals of a spoiled child.

Neither individuals nor corporations have any right to come into court and ask that the clock of history be stopped, or turned back.

Never appeal to a man's better nature. He may not have one. Invoking his self-interest gives you more leverage.

Never frighten a little man. He'll kill you.

Never try to outstubborn a cat.

Never try to teach a pig to sing. It's a waste of time and annoys the pig.

Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.

Never worry about theory as long as the machinery does what it's supposed to do.

No matter where or what, there are makers, takers, and fakers.

Nobody ever wins a lawsuit but the lawyers.

Obscurity is the refuge of incompetence.

One man's religion is another man's belly laugh.

Progress isn't made by early risers. It's made by lazy men trying to find easier ways to do something.

Reason is poor propaganda when opposed by the yammering, unceasing lies of shrewd and evil and self-serving men.

Revolutions are not won by enlisting the masses. Revolution is a science only a few are competent to practice. It depends on correct organization and, above all, on communications.

Secrecy is the beginning of tyranny.

Self-awareness is not just a bunch of amino acids bumping together.

Sex should be friendly. Otherwise stick to mechanical toys; it's more sanitary.

Sex without love is merely healthy exercise.

Sin lies only in hurting other people unnecessarily. All other sins are invented nonsense.

Specialization is for insects.

Stupidity cannot be cured with money, or through education, or by legislation.

Stupidity is the only universal capital crime; the sentence is death, there is no appeal, and execution is carried out automatically and without pity.

Taxes are not levied for the benefit of the taxed.

Television leaves no external scars.

The death rate is the same for us as for anybody... one person, one death, sooner or later.

The less respect an older person deserves the more certain he is to demand it from anyone younger.

The nice thing about citing god as an authority is that you can prove anything you set out to prove.

The truth of a proposition has nothing to do with its credibility. And vice versa.

The United States has become a place where entertainers and professional athletes are mistaken for people of importance.

Theology is never any help; it is searching in a dark cellar at midnight for a black cat that isn't there. Theologians can persuade themselves of anything.

There is no such thing as luck; there is only adequate or inadequate preparation to cope with a statistical universe.

There is no worse tyranny than to force a man to pay for what he does not want merely because you think it would be good for him.

There is nothing wrong with writing, so long as you do it in private and wash your hands afterward.

Was there ever a time when the majority was right?

What are the marks of a sick culture? It is a bad sign when the people of a country stop identifying themselves with the country and start identifying with a group. A racial group. Or a religion. Or a language. Anything, as long as it isn't the whole population.

Widows are far better than brides. They don't tell, they won't yell, they don't swell, they rarely smell, and they're grateful as hell.

Women and cats will do as they please. Men and dogs had better get used to it.

Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.

You don't pay back, you pay forward.

Categories: Quotes of the day, Robert A. Heinlein

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