Observations by and for the vaguely disenchanted.
Risking the wrath of the whatever
from high atop the thing.
Published Monday-Thursday. Usually.
Anything that's strange is no good to the average American. If it doesn't have Chicago plumbing, it's nonsense.
Anything you dream is fiction, and anything you accomplish is science, the whole history of mankind is nothing but science fiction.
Don't ever look at local television news again. It's all crap. There's no news, there's no information. It's negative, negative, negative. You look at that, and you think the world is coming to an end.
Go to the edge of the cliff and jump off. Build your wings on the way down.
I have three rules to live by: Get your work done. If that doesn't work, shut up and drink your gin, and when all else fails, run like hell.
I have two rules in life - to hell with it, whatever it is, and get your work done.
I wonder how many men, hiding their youngness, rise as I do, Saturday mornings, filled with the hope that Bugs Bunny, Yosemite Sam and Daffy Duck will be there waiting as our one true always and forever salvation?
If we listened to our intellect, we'd never have a love affair. We'd never have a friendship. We'd never go into business, because we'd be cynical. Well, that's nonsense. You've got to jump off cliffs all the time and build your wings on the way down.
If you can't read and write you can't think. Your thoughts are dispersed if you don't know how to read and write. You've got to be able to look at your thoughts on paper and discover what a fool you were.
If you don't want a man unhappy politically, don't give him two sides to a question to worry him; give him one. Better yet, give him none.
Insanity is relative. It depends on who has who locked in what cage.
Our civilization is flinging itself to pieces. Stand back from the centrifuge.
Ours is a culture and a time immensely rich in trash as it is in treasures.
People ask me to predict the future, when all I want to do is prevent it. Better yet, build it.
Read, read, read and put away computers. Forget the Internet, that's all crap.
Recreate the world in your own image and make it better for your having been here.
Science-fiction balances you on the cliff. Fantasy shoves you off.
Teachers are to inspire; librarians are to fulfill.
The human race likes to give itself airs. One good volcano can produce more greenhouse gases in a year that the human race has in its entire history.
The minute you get a religion you stop thinking. Believe in one thing too much and you have no room for new ideas.
There is more than one way to burn a book. And the world is full of people running about with lit matches.
There's no use going to school unless your final destination is the library.
To hell with more. I want better.
We are cups, constantly and quietly being filled. The trick is, knowing how to tip ourselves over and let the beautiful stuff out.
We have our Arts so we won't die of Truth.
We have too many cellphones. We've got too many Internets. We have got to get rid of those machines. We have too many machines now.
Why would you clone people when you can go to bed with them and make a baby? C'mon, it's stupid.
With schools turning out more runners, jumpers, racers, tinkerers, grabbers, snatchers, fliers, and swimmers instead of examiners, critics, knowers, and imaginative creators, the word “intellectual,” of course, became the swear word it deserved to be.
You don't have to burn books to destroy a culture. Just get people to stop reading them.
You have to know how to accept rejection and reject acceptance.