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Colbert reclaims Christianity
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Published Friday, December 17, 2010 @ 12:12 PM EST
Dec 17 2010

Colbert masterfully exposes conservative intellectual dishonesty and hypocrisy, and underscores the danger of angering a truly devout Sunday School teacher from New Jersey.

"Now what I like best about Bill [O'Reilly]'s argument is its complete factual inaccuracy. Because it would be inconvenient to guys like us to repeat what Jesus actually said. For instance, if someone wants your coat, give them your cloak as well. Rich people should sell all their possessions and give the money to the poor. Plus, the fact is, Jesus was way beyond self-destructive... he was self-sacrificial. I mean, the guy is God. He could have floated off that cross like Criss Angel Mindfreak. And I love, I love how Bill closes with "The Lord helps those who help themselves," kind of implying that Jesus said that, when it was actually Ben Franklin, who I believe belched out that proverb between mouthfuls of French whore."

"It's time to take baby Jesus out of the manger. Replace him with something that's easier to swallow. How about a honey-baked ham? Because if this is going to be a Christian nation that doesn't help the poor, either we've got to pretend that Jesus was just as selfish as we are, or we've got to acknowledge that he commanded us to love the poor and serve the needy without condition... and then admit that we just don't want to do it."


Categories: Colbert Report, Hypocrisy, Stephen Colbert, Video


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Worst Responders
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Published Friday, December 17, 2010 @ 7:10 AM EST
Dec 17 2010

Senate Republicans filibuster the Zadroga bill but pass tax cuts for the wealthy, which is great news for firefighters who make over $200,000 a year.

"Yet, there was one network that gave the 9/11 responders story the full 22 minutes of intense coverage that it deserved. But that network, unfortunately, was Aljazeera. Our networks were scooped with a sympathetic Zadroga bill story by the same network that Osama bin Laden sends his mixtapes to! This is insane!

911 first responders watch as Mitch McConnell cries over a friend's retirement, and Jon Kyl explains why the Senate can't work the week after Christmas.


Categories: Daily Show, Jon Stewart, Video


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The World News Now 2010 Christmas Polka
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Published Friday, December 17, 2010 @ 6:53 AM EST
Dec 17 2010


Categories: Music, Video, YouTube


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Poster of the day
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Published Friday, December 17, 2010 @ 6:48 AM EST
Dec 17 2010


Categories: Poster of the day


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TSA scanners foiled by... pancakes
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Published Friday, December 17, 2010 @ 12:20 AM EST
Dec 17 2010

"From now on, we can use strategically placed pancakes to cover our sausage and eggs."
-Stephen Colbert


Categories: Colbert Report, Video


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