Conceived above a saloon, delivered into this world by a masked man identified by his heavily sedated mother as Captain Video, raised by a kindly West Virginian woman, a mild-mannered former reporter with modest delusions of grandeur and no tolerance of idiots and the intellectually dishonest.


network solutions made me a child pornographer!
The sordid details...


Anniversary


Requiem for a fictional Scotsman


Oh my God! They killed Library!! Those bastards!!!


Elegy to a Mostly Maine Coon


It's a Hap-Hap-Happy Day


A Pittsburgher in the Really Big City


Da Burg Annat


I Have Issues


Yeah, yeah, I'm inspired


At least the rivers freeze in Pittsburgh


He knows if yinz is a jagoff


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dcl dialogue online!

I Love DCL


no. we're not that kgb.

Cool Spinny Thingy!


Ciao.
KGB, CIA linked


The Carbolic Smoke Ball
Superb satire, and based in Pittsburgh!


Americans United for Separation of Church and State

"No religious Test shall ever be required as a Qualification to any Office or public Trust under the United States."
Article VI, U.S. Constitution


Geek of the Week, 7/16/2000

Geek of the Week


Cruel Site of the Day, 7/15/2000

Cruel Site of the Day (7/15/2000)


miscellany

Hard to describe.


"a breezy writing style and a cool mix of tidbits"

USA Today Hotsite


Our riveting and morally compelling...

Privacy statement

One of  48,629 random quotes. Please CTRL-F5 to refresh the page.

Google
 
kgbreport.com Web


(July 2000 and earlier)


Saturday, August 01, 2009

Quote of the day

The truth will set you free. But not until it is finished with you.
-David Foster Wallace

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Friday, July 31, 2009

Poster of the day

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Quote of the day

If all the world's a stage, America is the shiny vertical pole in the middle.
-The Covert Comic

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MLK

What you can do with Auto-Tune, lots of time and true talent:

Some people have found this objectionable. I think it's tremendous. I'd love to hear a talented high school chorus do this. Kudos to The Gregory Brothers.

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Thursday, July 30, 2009

Happy Birthday, Paul Anka

 

What does an obscure song sung by Annette Funicello have to do with Paul Anka, you may ask. Listen to the melody.

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Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Quote of the day

A (local) restaurant named a milk shake after Lindsay Lohan. So next time you're in the area, treat yourself to a tall, frosty bi-curious train wreck.
-Conan O'Brien

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Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Now I get it...

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Song of the day

Ah, 1971. Happy Birthday, Jonathan Edwards.

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Monday, July 27, 2009

Theological insight of the day

 

(via Postsecret)

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Sunday, July 26, 2009

The evils of socialized medicine

We all know from the Republicans and Blue Dog Democrats that getting sick in Canada is a death warrant; months-long waits for treatment, etc.

Sadly, No! has the stats:

Circulatory disease deaths per 100,000:

Child maltreatment deaths per 100,000:

Digestive disease deaths per 100,000:

Infant mortality rate per 1,000 live births

Intestinal diseases death rate

Proability of not reaching age 60:

Respiratory disease child death rate per 100,000

Heart disease deaths per 100,000:

HIV deaths per million people:

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Copyright © 1987-2017 by Kevin G. Barkes
All rights reserved.
Violators will be prosecuted.
So there.  
The kgb@kgb.com e-mail address is now something other than kgb@kgb.com saga.
kgbreport.com used to be kgb.com until December, 2007 when the domain name broker Trout Zimmer made an offer I couldn't refuse. Giving up kgb.com and adopting kgbreport.com created a significant problem, however. I had acquired the kgb.com domain name in 1993, and had since that time used kgb@kgb.com as my sole e-mail address. How to let people know that kgb@kgb.com was no longer kgb@kgb.com but rather kgbarkes@gmail.com which is longer than kgb@kgb.com and more letters to type than kgb@kgb.com and somehow less aesthetically pleasing than kgb@kgb.com but actually just as functional as kgb@kgb.com? I sent e-mails from the kgb@kgb.com address to just about everybody I knew who had used kgb@kgb.com in the past decade and a half but noticed that some people just didn't seem to get the word about the kgb@kgb.com change. So it occurred to me that if I were generate some literate, valid text in which kgb@kgb.com was repeated numerous times and posted it on a bunch of different pages- say, a blog indexed by Google- that someone looking for kgb@kgb.com would notice this paragraph repeated in hundreds of locations, would read it, and figure out that kgb@kgb.com no longer is the kgb@kgb.com they thought it was. That's the theory, anyway. kgb@kgb.com. Ok, I'm done. Move along. Nothing to see here...

commentwear


Crystal Methodist


Laugh while you can, monkey-boy


I am a professional. Do not try this at home.


I canna change the laws of physics


As a matter of fact, I *am* the boss of you.
(as a matter of fact, i AM the boss of you.)


Truly great madness cannot be achieved without signficant intelligence


I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.


Left wing liberal nut job


Flies spread disease. Keep yours zipped.


Eff the ineffable, scrute the inscrutable.


If my answers frighten you then you should cease asking scary questions.


If evolution is just a theory, why am I surrounded by monkeys?


Nutrition makes me puke


Feral Geek


eat wisely


Dyslexics have more fnu!


It's here!

Eff and Scrute

440 pages, over 11,000 quotations!

Eff the Ineffable, Scrute the Inscrutable


get kgb krap!

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