Conceived above a saloon, delivered into this world by a masked man identified by his heavily sedated mother as Captain Video, raised by a kindly West Virginian woman, a mild-mannered former reporter with modest delusions of grandeur and no tolerance of idiots and the intellectually dishonest.


network solutions made me a child pornographer!
The sordid details...


Anniversary


Requiem for a fictional Scotsman


Oh my God! They killed Library!! Those bastards!!!


Elegy to a Mostly Maine Coon


It's a Hap-Hap-Happy Day


A Pittsburgher in the Really Big City


Da Burg Annat


I Have Issues


Yeah, yeah, I'm inspired


At least the rivers freeze in Pittsburgh


He knows if yinz is a jagoff


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dcl dialogue online!

I Love DCL


no. we're not that kgb.

Cool Spinny Thingy!


Ciao.
KGB, CIA linked


The Carbolic Smoke Ball
Superb satire, and based in Pittsburgh!


Americans United for Separation of Church and State

"No religious Test shall ever be required as a Qualification to any Office or public Trust under the United States."
Article VI, U.S. Constitution


Geek of the Week, 7/16/2000

Geek of the Week


Cruel Site of the Day, 7/15/2000

Cruel Site of the Day (7/15/2000)


miscellany

Hard to describe.


"a breezy writing style and a cool mix of tidbits"

USA Today Hotsite


Our riveting and morally compelling...

Privacy statement

One of  51,848 random quotes. Please CTRL-F5 to refresh the page.

Google
 
kgbreport.com Web


(July 2000 and earlier)


Saturday, November 29, 2008

Sleeping turkey

Why it's dangerous to doze off around here after Thanksgiving dinner.

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Historic photo

Well, to me, anyway. Granddaughter Leanna's first official school photo. She is a member of the class of 2021. I was class of 1971. Good Lord. Fifty years.

That's it. I'm going to bed.

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Friday, November 28, 2008

Signs of the Apocalypse, #784

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Thursday, November 27, 2008

"As God as my witness..."


WKRP in Cincinnati: Thanksgiving Turkey Bomb! @ Yahoo! Video

... I thought turkeys could fly."

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Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Game theory


(via Rafal Sulejman)

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What fresh hell is this?

Manty hose???

I'm sorry. This is just wrong. Dogs and cats, living together, mass hysteria wrong.

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Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Well, they did issue a winter weather advisory...

... but it doesn't take effect until noon, which sort of makes one wonder if things are going to get worse.

What you should see is beautiful downtown Fayette City, the train tracks, a barge heading up the Mon, and Allenport on the other side of the river.

No worries, though. The Thanksgiving shopping is mostly done, so we have lots of food. And if the power goes out, we'll just climb into bed with the seven shelties and two cats. I'm just glad I work from home and don't need to go anywhere today...

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Quotes of the day

As I grow older, I pay less attention to what men say. I just watch what they do.

The way to become rich is to put all your eggs in one basket and then watch that basket.

All honor's wounds are self-inflicted.

The first man gets the oyster, the second man gets the shell.

Do not look for approval except for the consciousness of doing your best.

Do your duty and a little more and the future will take care of itself.

There is no class so pitiably wretched as that which possesses money and nothing else.

-Andrew Carnegie (November 25, 1835 - August 11, 1919)

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Monday, November 24, 2008

Three little words for my charming fiance

Comforter, dog food

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It's not easy being... red

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Sunday, November 23, 2008

Poster of the day

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Copyright © 1987-2024 by Kevin G. Barkes
All rights reserved.
Violators will be prosecuted.
So there.  
The kgb@kgb.com e-mail address is now something other than kgb@kgb.com saga.
kgbreport.com used to be kgb.com until December, 2007 when the domain name broker Trout Zimmer made an offer I couldn't refuse. Giving up kgb.com and adopting kgbreport.com created a significant problem, however. I had acquired the kgb.com domain name in 1993, and had since that time used kgb@kgb.com as my sole e-mail address. How to let people know that kgb@kgb.com was no longer kgb@kgb.com but rather kgbarkes@gmail.com which is longer than kgb@kgb.com and more letters to type than kgb@kgb.com and somehow less aesthetically pleasing than kgb@kgb.com but actually just as functional as kgb@kgb.com? I sent e-mails from the kgb@kgb.com address to just about everybody I knew who had used kgb@kgb.com in the past decade and a half but noticed that some people just didn't seem to get the word about the kgb@kgb.com change. So it occurred to me that if I were generate some literate, valid text in which kgb@kgb.com was repeated numerous times and posted it on a bunch of different pages- say, a blog indexed by Google- that someone looking for kgb@kgb.com would notice this paragraph repeated in hundreds of locations, would read it, and figure out that kgb@kgb.com no longer is the kgb@kgb.com they thought it was. That's the theory, anyway. kgb@kgb.com. Ok, I'm done. Move along. Nothing to see here...

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Crystal Methodist


Laugh while you can, monkey-boy


I am a professional. Do not try this at home.


I canna change the laws of physics


As a matter of fact, I *am* the boss of you.
(as a matter of fact, i AM the boss of you.)


Truly great madness cannot be achieved without signficant intelligence


I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.


Left wing liberal nut job


Flies spread disease. Keep yours zipped.


Eff the ineffable, scrute the inscrutable.


If my answers frighten you then you should cease asking scary questions.


If evolution is just a theory, why am I surrounded by monkeys?


Nutrition makes me puke


Feral Geek


eat wisely


Dyslexics have more fnu!


It's here!

Eff and Scrute

440 pages, over 11,000 quotations!

Eff the Ineffable, Scrute the Inscrutable


get kgb krap!

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