Conceived above a saloon, delivered into this world by a masked man identified by his heavily sedated mother as Captain Video, raised by a kindly West Virginian woman, a mild-mannered former reporter with modest delusions of grandeur and no tolerance of idiots and the intellectually dishonest.
network solutions made me a child pornographer!
The sordid details...
Please support KGB Report by making your amazon.com purchases through our affiliate link:
dcl dialogue online!
no. we're not that kgb.
The Carbolic Smoke Ball
Superb satire, and based in Pittsburgh!
"No religious Test shall ever be required as a
Qualification to any Office or public Trust under the
Article VI, U.S. Constitution
Geek of the Week, 7/16/2000
Cruel Site of the Day, 7/15/2000
"a breezy writing style and a cool mix of tidbits"
Our riveting and morally compelling...
One of 28,480 random quotes. Please CTRL-F5 to refresh the page.
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Gee, what could go wrong?
Toshiba Builds 100x Smaller Micro Nuclear Reactor
Toshiba has developed a new class of micro size Nuclear Reactors that is designed to power individual apartment buildings or city blocks. The new reactor, which is only 20 feet by 6 feet, could change everything for small remote communities, small businesses or even a group of neighbors who are fed up with the power companies and want more control over their energy needs.
The 200 kilowatt Toshiba designed reactor is engineered to be fail-safe and totally automatic and will not overheat. Unlike traditional nuclear reactors the new micro reactor uses no control rods to initiate the reaction. The new revolutionary technology uses reservoirs of liquid lithium-6, an isotope that is effective at absorbing neutrons. The Lithium-6 reservoirs are connected to a vertical tube that fits into the reactor core. The whole whole process is self sustaining and can last for up to 40 years, producing electricity for only 5 cents per kilowatt hour, about half the cost of grid energy.
Toshiba expects to install the first reactor in Japan in 2008 and to begin marketing the new system in Europe and America in 2009.
(I can't carry four ounces of shampoo on an airplane, but the government will let me have a 200KW functioning nuclear reactor in my basement filled with liquid lithium-6? Cool. I just have to remember to change the filters. The dryer vent can double as a cooling tower. Where are my lead-lined boxers? And why is the cat box glowing in the dark?)
Update: Or, thankfully, maybe it's just a hoax.
Friday, April 25, 2008
Cartoon of the day
Quote of the day
The fact that curiosity killed the cat isn't an argument for not being curious, it's an argument for not being a cat.
The Covert Comic
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Better get that order in now...
Drollery of the day...
Today's Birthdays: . . . Shirley MacLaine, 346; Shirley MacLaine, 294; Shirley MacLaine, 229; Shirley MacLaine, 158; Shirley MacLaine, 74.
(from Zay N. Smith's QT column in the Chicago Sun-Times.)
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Puzzling spam of the day...
Tshirt of the day
A day late, but worth it...
"Happy Earth Day, honey."
Published in The New Yorker April 24, 2006
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Pennsylvania has Philadelphia at one end, Pittsburgh at the other, and Alabama in between.
Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.
-George J. Nathan
Always vote for principle, though you may vote alone, and you may cherish the sweetest reflection that your vote is never lost.
-John Quincy Adams
Never vote for the best candidate. Vote for the one who will do the least harm.
Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner.
If the Gods Had Meant Us to Vote They Would Have Given Us Candidates
-Jim Hightower (book title)
As people do better, they start voting like Republicans... unless they have too much education and vote Democratic, which proves there can be too much of a good thing.
Half of the American people never read a newspaper. Half never voted for president. One hopes it is the same half.
Perhaps I'm dyslexic...
... and clicked the wrong boxes, or there's something wrong with the test. The multiple intelligences one seems accurate, but that personality quiz... introverted? Moi?
I'm addicted to placebos. I'd quit, but it wouldn't matter.-Steven Wright
Monday, April 21, 2008
McCain's a Marxist
STEPHANOPOULOS: A lot of Senator Obama's allies and others say that you should condemn the comments of Reverend John Hagee, an evangelical pastor...
MCCAIN: Oh, I do. And I did. I said, any comments that he made about the Catholic church I strongly condemn, of course.
STEPHANOPOULOS: Yet you solicited and accepted his endorsement?
MCCAIN: Yes, indeed. I did. And I condemned the comments that he made concerning the Catholic church.
STEPHANOPOULOS: But you're going to hold onto his endorsement? Your own campaign acknowledged that you should have done a better job of vetting Pastor Hagee.
MCCAIN: Oh, sure.
STEPHANOPOULOS: So was it a mistake to solicit and accept his endorsement?
MCCAIN: Oh, probably, sure. But I admire and respect Dr. Hagee's leadership of the- of his church. I admire and appreciate his advocacy for the state of Israel, the independence of the state of Israel. I condemn remarks that are made that has anything to do which is condemning of the Catholic church, but- so...
STEPHANOPOULOS: ...no longer want his endorsement?
MCCAIN: I'm glad to have his endorsement. I condemn remarks that are, in any way, viewed as anti-anything. But thanks for asking.
(Or, in the words of the immortal Groucho Marx: "Those are my principles. If you don't like them, I have others.")
Sunday, April 20, 2008
T-Shirt of the Day
It Was What It Was
Copyright © 1987-2014 by Kevin G. Barkes
All rights reserved.
Violators will be prosecuted.
The email@example.com e-mail address is now something other than firstname.lastname@example.org saga.
kgbreport.com used to be kgb.com until December, 2007 when the domain name broker Trout Zimmer made an offer I couldn't refuse. Giving up kgb.com and adopting kgbreport.com created a significant problem, however. I had acquired the kgb.com domain name in 1993, and had since that time used email@example.com as my sole e-mail address. How to let people know that firstname.lastname@example.org was no longer email@example.com but rather firstname.lastname@example.org which is longer than email@example.com and more letters to type than firstname.lastname@example.org and somehow less aesthetically pleasing than email@example.com but actually just as functional as firstname.lastname@example.org? I sent e-mails from the email@example.com address to just about everybody I knew who had used firstname.lastname@example.org in the past decade and a half but noticed that some people just didn't seem to get the word about the email@example.com change. So it occurred to me that if I were generate some literate, valid text in which firstname.lastname@example.org was repeated numerous times and posted it on a bunch of different pages- say, a blog indexed by Google- that someone looking for email@example.com would notice this paragraph repeated in hundreds of locations, would read it, and figure out that firstname.lastname@example.org no longer is the email@example.com they thought it was. That's the theory, anyway. firstname.lastname@example.org. Ok, I'm done. Move along. Nothing to see here...
440 pages, over 11,000 quotations!
get kgb krap!