Conceived above a saloon, delivered into this world by a masked man identified by his heavily sedated mother as Captain Video, raised by a kindly West Virginian woman, a mild-mannered former reporter with modest delusions of grandeur and no tolerance of idiots and the intellectually dishonest.
network solutions made me a child pornographer!
The sordid details...
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The Carbolic Smoke Ball
Superb satire, and based in Pittsburgh!
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Thursday, November 25, 2004
Red and Blue Revue:
Paper Charts Values Gap:
Red States Love ‘Desperate Housewives’ and ‘Playboy’
By E&P (Editor & Publisher) Staff
Published: November 21, 2004 4:00 PM ET
NEW YORK- Much of the post-election analysis in the press has centered on so-called red state values and the alleged “values gap” in America. Perhaps with that in mind, The New York Times presented two stories which seemed to give lie to some of the post-election chatter concerning superior values in the red states.
On Monday, an article by Bill Carter showed that network TV execs remain unworried about any backlash to racy dramas in red states. In fact, the sex-obsessed “Desperate Housewives,” which now ranks second nationwide, is doing very well indeed in Tulsa, Okla, where it ranks 3rd; Orlando, Fla. and Salt Lake City, Utah, where's it's 4th, and in Atlanta, Ga., where it's #1.
“We say one thing and do another,” said Kevin Reilly, president of NBC Entertainment.
On Sunday, the Times presented a map and chart ranking states in what it called “random” categories, again throwing doubt on red state piety. For example, the states with the three highest divorce rates are all red (Nevada, Arkansas, Wyoming), while Massachusetts has the lowest rate.
Top three states for readership of Playboy magazine? Again, all red (Iowa, Wyoming, North Dakota), and they all top heathen New York by 2-1 margins.
Suicide rate? Once again, all red (New Mexico, Montana, Nevada), with the lowest rates all-blue (New Jersey, New York, Massaschusetts).
Murder rate? Again, reds in the lead, with two of the three the worst (Mississippi, Maryland, Louisiana). Blues hold two of the three with lowest rates (New Hampshire, Maine, South Dakota).
The top three states for abortions, however, were blue: New York, Delaware, Washington. Blues also topped the list of readers of The New Yorker and percentage of people holding bachelor's degrees or higher.
Red States and Blue States - There were 31 Red States in the 2004 election, and 19 Blue States.
Births to Single Moms- 9 of the 10 states with the highest rates of birth to single mothers are Red States. 4 of the 10 states with the lowest rates of birth to single mothers are Blue States.
Births to Teen Moms- All 10 of the 10 states with the highest rates of teen pregnancy are Red States. 9 of the 10 states with the lowest rates of teen pregnancy are Blue States.
Child Abuse. 8 of the 10 states with the highest reported incidence of child abuse are Red States. 4 of the 10 states with the lowest reported incidence of child abuse are Blue States.
College and Advanced Education- All 10 of the 10 states with the lowest percentages of citizens with college and/or advanced degrees are Red States. 8 of the 10 states with the highest percentages of citizens with college and/or advanced degrees are Blue States.
Divorce- All 10 of the 10 states with the highest rates of divorce are Red States. 7 of the 11 states with the lowest rates of divorce are Blue States (there is a statistical tie in the 7th spot among 5 states).
Execution of Minor Offenders- Only 6 states, all Red States, have executed a person for an offense committed while a minor since 1990. The only other countries where such executions have occurred since 1990 are China, the Democratic Republic of the Congo, Iran, Nigeria, Pakistan, Saudi Arabia and Yemen.
Federal Money Consumed- 8 of the 10 states consuming the highest per capita amounts of federal funds are Red States. 6 of the 10 states consuming the lowest per capita amounts of federal funds are Blue States.
Federal Taxes Paid- 9 of the 10 states paying the lowest per capita amounts of federal income taxes are Red States. 7 of the 10 states paying the highest per capita amounts of federal income taxes are Blue States.
Infant Mortality 2001- 9 of the 10 states with the highest rates of infant mortality are Red States. 8 of the 12 states with the lowest infant mortality rates are Blue States (there is a statistical tie in the 10th spot among 3 states).
Suicide- 8 of the 10 states with the highest rates of suicide are Red States. 9 of the 10 states with the lowest rates of suicide are Blue States.
Uninsured Children- 9 of the 10 states with the largest proportion of children without health insurance coverage are Red States. 7 of the 10 states with the smallest proportion of uninsured children are Blue States.
Uninsured Population- 10 of the 11 states with the largest proportion of citizens without health insurance coverage are Red States (there is a statistical tie in the 10th spot between 2 states). 7 of the 10 states with the smallest proportion of uninsured citizens are Blue States.
Violent Crime- 7 of the 10 states with the highest rates of violent crime are Red States. 4 of the 10 states with the lowest rates of violent crime are Blue States.
Wednesday, November 24, 2004
Hot enough for ya?
A friend in Nashville, Alan Fisher, passes along the attached forecast for the city this week.
I'd suggest staying inside until it cools down a bit.
Monday, November 22, 2004
The proverbial flying halt...
So much for a relaxing week off.
I didn't get everything resolved before leaving work last Friday, so I had to spend about three hours on the phone with customers last night and I have a night or so of programming ahead me for another customer's problem.
My laptop, which has accompanied me on 66 flights and about 34,000 miles in the past 17 months, appears to have died a horrible death. The hard drive had been a bit noiser than usual in the past week and I noticed the machine was somewhat sluggish.
Last night the hard drive died. I tried to boot from the system CD-ROM, and received a cryptic bios error message. I looked it up on the manufacturer's web site and it implied euthanasia was an appropriate response.
So, some holiday funds have to be diverted for a new notebook. And in addition to all the madness involved in getting the house ready to host Thanksgiving dinner, I'm going to have to spend about 15=20 hours restoring things.
These vacations are killers. The last one involved dental surgery.
Next time, I'm going to call a travel agent.
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Violators will be prosecuted.
The firstname.lastname@example.org e-mail address is now something other than email@example.com saga.
kgbreport.com used to be kgb.com until December, 2007 when the domain name broker Trout Zimmer made an offer I couldn't refuse. Giving up kgb.com and adopting kgbreport.com created a significant problem, however. I had acquired the kgb.com domain name in 1993, and had since that time used firstname.lastname@example.org as my sole e-mail address. How to let people know that email@example.com was no longer firstname.lastname@example.org but rather email@example.com which is longer than firstname.lastname@example.org and more letters to type than email@example.com and somehow less aesthetically pleasing than firstname.lastname@example.org but actually just as functional as email@example.com? I sent e-mails from the firstname.lastname@example.org address to just about everybody I knew who had used email@example.com in the past decade and a half but noticed that some people just didn't seem to get the word about the firstname.lastname@example.org change. So it occurred to me that if I were generate some literate, valid text in which email@example.com was repeated numerous times and posted it on a bunch of different pages- say, a blog indexed by Google- that someone looking for firstname.lastname@example.org would notice this paragraph repeated in hundreds of locations, would read it, and figure out that email@example.com no longer is the firstname.lastname@example.org they thought it was. That's the theory, anyway. email@example.com. Ok, I'm done. Move along. Nothing to see here...
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